Sunday Playlist

Yesterday, I went to buy some shoes at the Fashion Place Mall, and I'm happy to inform you that the parking lot was packed and there were tons of people everywhere. However, I was not accosted by crazy people trying to sell me Dead Sea beauty products or wireless phones--always a plus. I was a little less happy later that night trying to find parking downtown so I could see a play my friends were in. Nary a parking spot was to be found, and I thought so much for the damn recession! It was one of those glib thoughts I have, like when it's freezing cold outside and one wonders what ever happened to global warming. The recession and global warming are both real and serious, but some days it's difficult to find the symptoms.

Yesterday, after buying some shoes (yay!), I stopped by Ellen's apartment because I needed her to approve my purchases so I could feel good about myself. I usually see Ellen only once a month or so, but dropping by her place spur of the moment and chatting for a couple of hours felt like the most natural thing in the world--just like we were back in college. Her husband came home and we all continued talking and it was delightful. And we already have a playdate for next weekend.

So now to the meat of this post. I've had a Sunday playlist for a couple of years now, and for no real reason I felt like putting it up here. It mostly consists of my confessional female singer/songwriters (Tori Amos, Alanis Morissette, Sarah McLachlan, etc.) appropriating the patriarchal symbols and codified structures of religion for their own ends. But as well all know from Foucault, whenever we attack a power structure such an act recognizes and legitimizes said power structure. But I don't feel Amos and Morissette are trying to destroy religion, their endgame is simply to subvert religious symbols and create a space for their own worship. It's what I wrote my thesis on. Except SUU's English Department doesn't have a thesis program, but it was my final project/paper for Advanced Critical Methods so I feel it's very thesis-like (that and my final Shakespeare paper). I've never felt that it is an anti-religion playlist, just an alternative religious whathaveyou. It's not very balanced or cohesive--if a song is somehow religious or even just mentions Sunday then it's on here. For example, there's a couple of musical song numbers. I like to listen to it on shuffle, so it's listed here in no particular order.

"Crucify" Tori Amos--This is one of my all-time favorite songs. Out of so much goodness my favorite line is probably "I know a cat named Easter / He says will you ever learn / You're just an empty cage girl / If you kill the bird," and the chorus features "I've been looking for a savior in these dirty streets / Looking for a savior beneath these dirty sheets." In the end, the song is about learning to stop crucifying oneself, especially in a patriarchal Christian religion where women have been culturally subjugated for Eve's sin. It is important to note that Amos is the rebellious daughter of a North Carolina pastor, and she has personally had to work through a great deal of shame which frequently shades her lyrics.

"Building a Mystery" Sarah McLachlan--This is another favorite. I love the mention of all sorts of religions from vampires to rasta, from voodoo to "a cross from a faith that died / Before Jesus came." I just love the idea of this man who is building a mystery cobbled together from bits and pieces of other religions.

"Father Lucifer" Tori Amos--"Father Lucifer / You never looked so sane / You always did prefer the drizzle to the rain." My favorite part of this song is the gorgeous bridge. Amos tells us that this song came after a drug trip with a South American shaman where she had a cup of tea with Lucifer. When she says Lucifer she's talking about darkness and shadow and understanding that; she's not talking about Satanism. Personally I love the idea that Lucifer is our natural father which reminds me a good deal of the story "Young Goodman Brown" by Nathaniel Hawthorne. My second favorite part is this line: "He didn't see me watching / From the aeroplane / He wiped a tear / And then he threw away our appleseed."

"Pie Jesu" Andrew Lloyd Weber--this is from Weber's Requiem preformed by Sarah Brightman and Paul Miles-Kingston. I know there are many other versions of "Pie Jesu," but I really enjoy this one. I also love some good soprano singing.

"Body and Soul" Tori Amos--I love this song because Amos is says "Come and kneel with me Body AND Soul." Many religions tell us that our bodies are wicked and are trying to keep our souls from reaching a state of grace, and Amos is trying to subvert this soul|body dichotomy. The chorus leads off with "Seven devils bring them on / I have left my weapons / Cause I think you're wrong / these devils of yours they need love." And I love the end: "I'll save you from that Sunday sermon / Boy I think you need a conversion / Body and Soul."

"Past the Mission" Tori Amos--I think this best shows what Amos is trying to do: beyond organized patriarchal religion, there is a free space and there is hope. It's a great music video too. "Past the mission / They're closing every hour / Past the mission / I smell the roses." It reminds me of e.e. cummings's Tulips and Chimneys--the contrast between phallic structures and yonic symbols. I also love this line "Hey they found a body / Not sure it was his / But they're using his name." This reminds me of the Council of Nicea where they decided on the divinity of Jesus. To me it's like"Hey, there's this guy named Yeshua, we don't know a whole lot about him except for these unreliable and contradictory accounts written by some random people, but let's make these (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John) official and the rest apocryphal, and let's make this man the Christ the Son of God, and get on with this religion because it suits us politically." Wow, if that's not a charged statement, I don't know what is. Um, so let's move on . . .

"Samson" Regina Spektor--I love this song! I think it's another instance where a woman is trying to reclaim the story of Delilah or possibly someone else. "Beneath the sheets of paper lies my truth / ... / The Bible didn't mention us / Not even once." It's like the Delilah story presented to us in the Bible is so different from what actually happened that it's unrecognizable. Of course the narrator could be someone completely different from Delilah: "You are my sweetest downfall / I loved you first." I love the idea that Samson causes the downfall of this woman (or man) instead of the other way around. Take that Samson Agonistes!

"Happy Phantom" Tori Amos--a delightful rumination on death and the afterlife. "And if I die today / I'll be the HAPPY phantom / And I'll go chasin' / Nuns out in the yard / ... / The HAPPY phantom / Has no right to bitch." It also features a darker reflection "The sun is getting dim / Will we pay for who we been." And I love this religious imagery: "There's Judy Garland / Taking Buddha by the hand / ... /They say Confucius / Does his crossword with a pen / I'm still the angel / To a girl who hates to SIN."

"Forgiven" Alanis Morissette--This is a great song from an artist who happens to have been raised a Catholic. I think I can sum up the gist of this song with these lyrics: "I confessed my darkest deeds to an envious man / My brothers they never went blind for what they did / But I may as well have / In the name of the Father, the Skeptic, and the Son."

"Into the Fire" Sarah McLachlan--This is another song about reclaiming Eve. "Open the doors that lead on into Eden / Don't want no cheap disguise / I follow the signs marked back to the beginning / No more compromise." I like this because McLachlan seems to be saying we need to go all the way back to Genesis to get everything right again, and the feminist fight implied with "no more compromise." The lyrics also state "Into the fire / I am the spark" which is the very Gnostic (and American) idea of a person's inner divinity.

"Hallelujah" Jeff Buckley--written by Leonard Cohen and it's such a great song. The Buckley cover was notably used in The West Wing episode "Posse Comitatus." I also love the Rufus Wainwright version which I first heard on the Shrek soundtrack and was forever only available from iTunes as part of the The L Word album only. But now it's been released as a single and I'm downloading it right now! Anyway, I love how it uses the stories of King David and Samson, and in the Wainwright cover he changes "And the holy dove was moving too" to "And the holy dark was moving too" which is fantastic. Both covers are great!

"Tourniquet" Evanescence--I used to love this (Christian metal) band for a couple of years in college, but I hardly listen to them now. Anyway the cover of this song is written from the POV of someone who just committed suicide and it questions the controversy in Christianity if those who commit suicide go straight to Hell even if they accept Christ at the very end.

"Tell Me on a Sunday" Sarah Brightman--This is a show tune from the Andrew Lloyd Weber musical Song & Dance. A woman is telling her current lover that when he leaves her, she wants him to "Take me to a park that's covered with trees / Tell me on a Sunday please." Anyway, it's a beautiful and sad song.

"God" Tori Amos--This is possibly her most inflammatory song. "God sometimes you just don't come through / Do you need a woman to look after you." Amos says she's searching for the goddess in this song. I love this line: "A few witches burning gets a little toasty here / I gotta find why you always go when the wind blows."

"Icicle" Tori Amos--This is a wonderful song, and I love the audacity when Amos finds a spiritual connection by masturbating. That sex and god are linked is not a new idea, but it's one that's often excluded (or at least specifically limited) in Western/Christian theology. "When they say 'Take of His body' / I think I'll take from mine instead / Getting off, getting off while they're all downstairs / Singing prayers, sing away, He's in my pumpkin p.j.'s / Lay your Book on my chest / Feel the Word."

"Still" Alanis Morissette--This is from the Dogma soundtrack, a movie in which Miss Morissette plays God. In the song she is singing as God who is all things to all people. She sees everything including all the terrible things that people do to each other but she loves us still. It also reminds me of this bit from Will & Grace where Jack has a button that reads "God is coming and She is pissed!" and Karen laughs, "God is a woman . . . it's funny 'cause it's blasphemous."

Holy cow! (no pun intended), this was a freaking long blog. I need to learn how Megan keeps her playlist blogs so short. I think if you finished this, you should leave me comment, however brief, to let me know you're a trooper. Anyway, I hope this was interesting, and I hope it didn't offend any of my religious friends. There are other Amos songs which contain religious imagery/meaning but these were the main ones. Also let me know of other songs I should put on my playlist. Maybe "Sunday Morning" by No Doubt? And I would love a great version of "Ave Maria." Shalom.